Carry On

I don't want to invoke a pity party with this post, but the last four weeks have been four of the craziest, most emotional, and most physically taxing that I can remember in quite a while.  It started with Anna sharing a cold with me the weekend before Charlotte arrived; then there was the whole two-day labor and subsequent recovery of birthing a child, including passing several ridiculously-sized blood clots and post-partum hormones; an eye infection that popped up as I'm still dealing with that pesky cold; our toddler came home with a fever that turns into the early stages of a stomach virus that led to projectile vomit and some of the most vile diapers I've ever changed; and over the past five days Mike and I have been dealing with the same stomach virus, and for me, it's on top of the cold that won't die and an eye infection that apparently wants to stick around too.  Oh yeah, and we have two kids under the age of two.

FUN. TIMES.

All of that said, the last four weeks have been some of the most fun, most honest, most humbling, and most rewarding of my life.  There's a popular song out right now, Carry On by the group fun; I hear it quite often as HGTV is the background for at least half of my 100 nursing sessions each day (OK, maybe it's not that many, but some days it feels like that) and they're using it in several promotional commercials.  When the song came on my iPod yesterday it got me thinking, and because I'm still hormonal it also had me tearing up; things have been crazy with a capital C, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.  Not ANYTHING.  Instead I'll Carry On and will find the bright side to the cards I've been dealt at the moment.  I can't imagine what I'd do with my time if I wasn't thinking about the next nursing session, or checking to see if my shirt has breast-milk or spit-up stains on it before leaving the house, or if we had enough toddler-approved food at home, or if we needed more diapers, or when I may sleep for more than two hours at a time again.  OK, maybe I'd take the world's longest nap; but when I woke up, I'd feel lost and alone.  At that moment, that song made me realize what a  metaphor those two little words were for life in general.  Things get crazy, they don't always go as planned, but what a blessing it is to live each and every day, to be able to carry on.

So, for now, I'm going to go nurse my little girl who turns one month old this weekend, check my shirt for stains, and if the stars align, we may leave the house and hit up the local coffee shop drive-thru for a smoothie this afternoon.  And, for me, today, that's just perfect.

This smile ...

... the reason that I Carry On each day!