Letter to Anna: Month forty-eight

Dear Anna,

I can’t believe you’re four years old! You’ve changed so much in the past year, the past 6 months, the past week … it’s amazing. You’ve grown physically, mentally, and emotionally this past year and it’s hard to imagine when you were small enough to be cradled in my arms. You’re long and lanky, tall as a bean pole, and have the most beautiful features. More importantly though, you glow from the inside out, have a beautiful soul and a heart of gold.

You’re just a delight to be around lately and are truly one of the sweetest girls. You feel big emotions on both ends of the spectrum and I just love watching how you’re learning process and communicate your feelings. I obviously don’t love seeing you sad or upset, but I do love seeing how you’re better able to understand what you’re feeling, how to properly express those feelings, and how to pick yourself up and carry-on. You’re also starting to recognize and process the feelings of those around you and I love the tender moments when you offer a hug to someone feeling blue. You don’t have much in the way of a poker face yet and still wear your heart on your sleeve, and I’m not anxious for either of those qualities to go away.

The only thing bigger than your heart is your imagination and it’s so fun to watch and listen to you play or have a conversation with your sister or friends. You play some typical childhood games with your sister like house or pretending to be an animal, but it’s the intricate detail you bring to your games and stories that amazes me. The names, the specifics, what you’re doing and seeing. You’re at a point where you can, and sometimes prefer, to play independently (break my heart a little, why don’t ya?!). I remember telling my Mom to go away when I played with my dolls because she had a lame imagination, and now the tables are turned. Lame happens, let me tell ya’. You love a good bedtime story, one that involves you as a princess, woodland creatures, and ends with a family trip to Frisch’s; and many nights you get so detailed with your request that I suggest you tell ME a story; to which you roll your eyes and usually respond with a {irritated huff} “no, Mommy, YOU tell the story!”

You have A LOT of questions, but that also means you can have pretty interesting conversations and I’m starting to understand your views and thought process a little better. Your mannerisms are hilarious and I often feel like a teenager is talking to me. You’re prone to putting your hand on your hip and sashaying it in such a way that you look like you’re 4 going on 14, or you’ll get flustered or frustrated and throw your hands in the air, sometimes with a slight eye roll. There are a lot of “whys” and “whens” in our life and you haven’t quite grasped time, so we’re careful to only share big news when you’ll get to share the experience soon. UNLIKE the time your Dad told you about our trip to Florida that included an airplane ride and trip to Disneyworld approximately 6 weeks in advance, which led to daily and very detailed questions.

You’re too sweet for words when it comes to you sister and the feeling is 110% mutual. You are her protector, playmate, comforter, and sometimes antagonist, but you love her fiercely. Since she’s your literal shadow there are some activities, like certain arts & crafts, play-doh, that just don’t happen very often because she’s such a loose cannon. And is a lover of eating play-doh. You generally understand and we try to keep things fair. Like not letting her watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on a revolving reel. She doesn’t get treats at night and gets fewer special Mommy & Daddy dates because she’s a little too young to understand, but on the flip sides, she’s also a little too young to full understand time-outs and the other less fun swaps that don’t always equal fair treatment.

You’ve expanded your palette and are actually a pretty good eater these days. It takes some time for you to concentrate on breakfast, but you usually power through lunch, dinner and MANY, MANY snacks throughout the day. I don’t know what life with teenage boys would be like, but I really can’t imagine it’s much different than your current appetite. Luckily we promote healthy snacks and no treats unless you’ve eaten your fair share and behaved well during the day. You LOVE peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, chicken nuggets, cheese burgers, mac n cheese, all fruit, broccoli, frozen peas (yes, frozen), green beans, and pretend to like salad just so that we share the croutons with you.

You had a wonderful princess birthday party with your friends and family at the park. You loved the attention and the time with your friends, playing, and cupcakes. You’ve come out of your shell a bit, and although your best friend is still Audrey, we’re working on expanding your horizons. We heard how smart and sweet you are (no surprise there!) at your parent-teacher conference this month and were reassured that you’re doing all the right things and progressing right on schedule. You’re not a wallflower, but you’re also not one to be in the middle of conflict. Your teachers like that you know when I stay away from a bad situation and can stand up for yourself; and that makes us proud too!

Four years seems like just yesterday and forever all at the same time. I can’t imagine life without you, your quirks, your hugs and kisses, your questions, and your sweet smile. Thank you for giving me the greatest gift of all, being your Mommy. I love you more and more each day, and though I’m sad that you no longer fit neatly into my arms, I couldn’t  be more proud of the brave, sweet, honest, and loving girl you’ve become.

Love,

Mom